She Who Shall Not Be Let In

I know I am not the only one out here in SUPPOSED-To-Be-A-Pottermore-Beta-Land that is still waiting for an owl granting them access.  But I am starting to feel like She Who Shall Not Be Let In.  Come on, say my name!  Glow Hallow!  Say my name–so that I can become more powerful and re-energize from this barely alive thing that I am.  A Pottermore Wannabe.  Do not make me resort to drinking unicorn blood to stay alive. 

I feel like those of us still on the outside are a teaming mass waiting for the gates to open.  If you’ve ever been to any of the Disney Parks before they officially open for the day… well once you are through those turnstyles…you are kept penned in waiting behind cast members LITERALLY holding a rope that you must stay behind… at the appointed time… the rope drops and you can begin your magical journey.  Right now I feel like those of us still seeking our welcome letters are waiting for that rope to drop–and we keep waiting…and waiting…jostling for position…and the rope keeps staying in place.  If we knew concretely when the appointed hour would come…we could go home and come back another day… but we just keep waiting in no particular order–one writhing mass of people waiting to get in.

At Disney…the popular attractions have FastPasses…instead of waiting for hours on incredibly long lines, you are issued a FastPass that gives you a time to return–so that you can get right on the ride.  You probably will wait just as long as you would have while standing on line–but you were not tied up wasting your time doing nothing. You knew to come back at a time that you could be accommodated.

As a marketing professional, I really do think this whole Beta promotion has been mishandled. Those of us who managed to solve the magic quill quizzes and register during each of the daily clues, felt like we had one some kind of lottery.  We were thrilled to get one of the coveted spots as early entrants to Pottermore.  But more than 2 weeks later, only a small percentage of early registrants have been allowed in.  It would have been less cruel to have limited the number of beta registrants to a pool of people they could actually utilize RIGHT AWAY.  Another approach would have been to have done a magic quill contest weekly for a period of 7 weeks…with each week’s winners being allowed IMMEDIATE access.  The site would have a week to absorb the newcomers before the next quill challenge. Only those who had successfully registered would be allowed in–so nobody would be felt like they were waiting for access–just waiting for the next challenge to TRY to gain a spot.  And if they failed…they would know that they would have another opportunity the next week.  That would give the developers a full week to scale the site to a growing number of users–and give them some deadlines towards fixing bugs and eliminating cheats and loopholes. 

It doesn’t make any of us still waiting feel very good about the way this promotion is being handled.  As a marketing person–I think whoever conceived this promotion in its executed state should be sent to Azkaban.  The whole thing just seems so very wrong.  I have zero confidence that the rest of the betas will be incorporated any time soon.  I can’t imagine that the site will be ready to open to the public in October.  Even thought the site vaguely states that public registration will open in October–they are giving themselves the entire month to get their act together.  And even then, they are only saying that REGISTRATION will open to the public then….not ACCESS.  Then they can split hairs and say they didn’t make any promises.  But even when you keep things purposely vague and ambiguous–people are not stupid and they know when they are being given the run around.  It is NOT good for Harry Potter as a brand. 

The only good thing about this experience so far…is the people I have met via Twitter.  They are the only thing that makes this whole drawn out experience at all bearable.  Because I think the way that Sony has handled this roll out is beyond pathetic.  I feel like they have performed a Cruciatus Curse on all of us still waiting in limbo.  unforgivable.

I am a beta waiting for my owl
I am a house elf waiting for a sock
I am light trapped in a deluminator
A thought lost in a pensieve
I am a ghost living in a toilet
I missed my train to Hogwarts
I have no flying Anglia
I need a dose of Felix Felicis

I wish all of us still waiting could send howlers to Pottermore!